Chuck Yates Needs A Job

0:21 Hey everybody, welcome to Chuck Yates. We need to job the podcast where we are on episode five of Deep Diving Landman, the new Billy Bob Thornton show on Paramount TV. That actually, the way I

0:35 said that, it's like we have a sponsorship from Paramount. We don't have shit. So they can pay us some money if they wanted. But anyway, let's jump in. Gates, your first favorite scene from

0:47 episode five. I did not like the quote, but I loved the scene in the board room, where Monty is sitting there talking with all the other big wigs and they got guys talking about how

1:02 the sentiment has shifted against fossil fuels and all that. And Monty's outburst started with, We're well diggers, goddamn it. And I don't really like the well diggers part of it. But at the

1:17 same time, I liked the scene. I think they've been doing a pretty good job pushing back on some of that narrative. And Monty's point about we can't control what they do with our product after we

1:30 produce it. And it's the one product that they interact with every single day of their lives. So I mean, that really does sum up kind of what we do as a whole in the oil industry for not just the

1:43 United States, but the world Yeah, no, I like that scene a lot and, you know, the, I don't give a fuck what the governor of California says or how many kids are blocking London freeways in front

2:00 of art galleries. I thought that was a good bullshit or spray painting a statue or whatever. Yeah. You know, that's all just kind of a distraction and that was I think Monty's point and I really

2:13 enjoyed that part of it.

2:18 Yeah I thought that was a pretty good scene like from what I've seen from you know just looking back at all these episodes is it seems like Taylor shared and did a really good job with the research

2:32 around kind of the common speak in the language in oil and gas like I feel like there's a really detailed effort on just the various scenes I do think there's a lot of just dead time throughout but I

2:48 thought that was a a pretty a pretty poignant scene pretty good I mean it may may be selfish but I thought what one thing that was really hilarious was how she wanted to jump in the car with him and I

3:03 guess he said he was going to fort worth and he ended up going to the field but that reminds me of of the warden wanting to go with me and I'm like no you're not going to do and then They got in the

3:16 car and she started playing the ABC game, ABC game. And I'm like, oh my God, this is just like getting in the car. I thought that was pretty funny. Well, the one thing though, that was funny.

3:30 So I was watching it with the British girlfriend, right? And they're sitting in that boardroom and the guy starts talking and he's in the British accent. Talking about, well, 25 of our

3:41 electricity is provided by wind power And she's like, why do y'all have to fucking pick on the bread? Why does the bread have to be the bad guy, the bore? What were you thinking? Well, I love

3:54 the scene and the, you know, that's the Crescent Club in Dallas, by the way. I don't know if anybody. Yeah, that's how somebody asked my wife was like, where is that? Is that petroleum club?

4:04 I said, no, that's the crest. You can tell by that window in there that rounded out window. But I like that scene a lot You know the I you know it his fucking wife is such a psychopath and a child

4:18 and I that she's somebody that like I would need my business partner would need to keep me away from because that's exactly who I would fucking gravitate towards. That is precisely the sort of woman

4:28 that does it for me and she's a fucking lunatic and she'd ruin my life and I have a family history of this shit.

4:35 Ally Larter's hot. No doubt. The guy she is. You've got to see a little glimpse of her ass too Pretty good to ask for a skinny girl.

4:45 48 year old skinny girl no less. The our dear friend, all of our dear friends Stacy McDonald has tweeted out a couple of times something to the effect of God damn why are all the women psycho on

4:57 this show? Because they're like that in real life Stacy. I mean not you necessarily.

5:04 I had a conversation last night at a happy hour with a female title attorney here in San Antonio and she said that she had watched. most of the episodes, I think she was through episode four. And

5:17 she said, I just get so pissed off that they make every woman in the show seem like either a complete dumbass or like a hardcore bitch. And the portrayal of women is something that's come up quite a

5:32 few times on social media and other platforms about, you know, I know it's character development and everything, but they really are leaning in hard on that crazy chick vibe. Yeah, and on that

5:45 note with

5:47 the attorney where she's basically trying to negotiate with the family without any counsel, like what no attorney would do that. Right. And I was just like, that's just not a, I don't know if

6:01 it's an attack on women or if it's even that, but I felt like That was kind of ridiculous, no attorneys gonna do that.

6:11 You know, the other woman that we haven't talked about is the widow that

6:19 Billy Bob's son is starting to have a little thing for. And I kind of get the romance and that happening all but, and I get it that her

6:34 husband just died. She just seems really, really forward on, I need a dad for my kid. This does not feel like, you know, this doesn't feel any way organic or not. This feels like you're next,

6:49 dude. Yeah, I was plugging play. My last, you know, Rick hand husband left, you're next. This is easy, just real quick replacement. It's like when a dog dies and you just go get another one

7:02 for the kid immediately. That's like, you know, it's not that easy, you know. That's what it felt like to me I think her character, to me, She's 19 years old or something like that. I don't

7:14 know if they've said how old she actually is, but I think Elvio was supposed to be 23 when he died. So she's pretty young. I think they leaned in pretty hard on like the young vulnerability and are

7:29 trying to redeem some of that with pushing back on, you know, whatever the guy's name is that shows up and pulls the gun again. Yeah, I feel like that was one of the, like some of the scenes

7:41 around that were just too long. Like I get where they're, I think I get where they're trying to go with it. But

7:50 I don't know, at the same time, like I've never lost a husband or a wife. I guess, yeah, I wouldn't have lost a husband but a wife. So you can share, we're in a judgment zone, brother.

8:03 I mean, I think like they do a decent job with it because, you know, he's over there, like cleaning up the yard.

8:12 doing things that she appreciated and that her husband used to do. So I mean, I do think like it some of these scenes just gets so drawn out. It's like, let's there was a lot of cinematic

8:24 lawnmower action in that scene. Well, like, like, I really want to mow this whole fucking yard. Like that was going to be the whole show. I was really confused. The landscaping show, the

8:35 landscaper, not the landman anymore. Yeah. And it even kind of felt like at one point on there, they put it in slow motion to make it even more dramatic pushing the lawnmower. Yeah, that was

8:46 that was a bit much on there. You know, there's something subtle going on in this episode, I think, because, you know, we're going to talk about, we talked about money speech, which I think is

8:59 oil field. And then we're going to talk about, you know, how we basically have a body count of at least one person dying each each episode in the scene, but up I felt like this was kind of a

9:11 transformation from an oil field show to now we're getting into actual characters. 'Cause like dude, Mo and the lawn could have been in any show, Billy Bob Thornton and Allie Lardard trying to

9:28 renew their and marriage that whole dinner party that went on almost as long as the lawn mower mowing. I mean, that's husband and wife shit that could have happened in any setting too So it kind of

9:39 felt like we moved more into the character plot as opposed to oil field on this one. Well, they did start off with them sitting out there talking about reworking all of those wells, 17 wells,

9:54 those 35-year-old,

9:58 that 35-year-old field that Monty owns. And so they had a little bit of that, and then they just dropped straight into the family drama for the majority of that episode. You know, some math I did

10:09 on that,

10:11 you know, 'cause when that well came back online, let's say, I think he said it was making 250 barrels of oil. But let's just take 200 barrels of oil, multiply that times 365 days in a year times

10:28 35 years. You know, if that's what had happened with these wells, that's 26 million barrels. Those are some big freaking wells, you know? And I don't know that, I mean, do you have vertical

10:45 wells out in the Permian that have made 27 million barrels of oil and are still making 200 barrels a day? I don't know that that's the case. I think your 35 years is a bit aggressive, especially

10:60 for an oil well out there, but you have gas wells, deep Ellenberg gas wells out there that have been absolutely prolific.

11:09 But yeah, I think the workover thing,

11:14 probably with your calculation may, that feels like it's a little stout,

11:22 but I mean, I'm familiar with groups that have gone in with kind of a vertical acquisition, vertical well acquisition strategy among all the shale plays because it's just an opportunity that no

11:34 one's paying attention to I think the 250 is probably your P1, P1,

11:43 P1. Well, it is a show about a land man predicting oil reserves as opposed to a reservoir engineer. One of Billy Bob's points when he talked to Monty during that scene was, well, they're all

11:57 pulling from the same reserve and there's no risk here. And I saw that and I was like, And that's not so sure about the no risk part, you know. I don't think you're gonna get the same results on

12:09 every single one of those wells. And

12:13 that's not really how it works in the real world. You don't really know how extensive a workover operation is gonna be until you actually start it. Well, and I do like Monty's point back. Monty's

12:25 like, I wanna see production results before you do the next one. I know it's hard to keep the rig going and stuff, but that felt semi-realistic to me And then Billy Bob gets off the phone and

12:38 starts talking about, you know, getting money from a billionaire is like pulling teeth. And I was like, man, that was a 30-second phone call. That was pretty easy. That's the easiest couple

12:48 million bucks. I've never gotten a couple million bucks in a 30-second phone call. Well, technically it was two million dollar workover on 17 wells, you know, 34 million. I guarantee you the

12:59 phone call to Kate Anderson is a little longer than that shit.

13:04 Some more. That's some more.

13:06 Yeah, exactly. Boer, give me your take on the scene with the cartel, when the cartel shows up. I like that scene. I mean, you know, it seems to me that just getting into the show and not

13:22 necessarily how real or fake that is, but just, it seems like a pretty risky strategy for Billy Bob to just sit, sorry, there's a siren in my background. For Billy Bob to just sit there and kind

13:31 of, you know, smart ass this guy right in his face, that guy's, presumably, has killed, and we saw him kill a guy in the first episode, that guy. And like he just shot a guy next to him. So

13:43 like, I don't know, I mean, that kind of, he might oughta be a little nicer to that guy. You know, can we settle for a million bucks or something?

13:52 How about some new roads? Yeah. I'll build you a runway by your own plane. I thought that was another good scene where Billy Bob just showed his oil field intelligence

14:05 and Yeah I'm with you like he was probably the he was definitely laying his life on the line there but I think it's been pretty clear that Billy Bob's not too concerned about about his life Yeah I

14:19 mean that was great you know cause he blow you know he bluffed with hey there's a d a plane circling looking at our ASS now cause of what you did and you know your your products expensive minds way

14:32 more expensive than the whole force of the U S government's Gonna come marching in near if you fuck with me they don't give a shit about our conversation right now so I thought that was pretty ballsy

14:45 but I wouldn't be able to do that through Hell know that I mean it's like like get in the face of a pit bull is what it felt like to me that I did like the one scene where a the the widow calls cooper

15:01 and is sitting there saying I'm scared somebody's going to break in and Cooper's like That fucking dog there. There's no way. Right. Yeah. What is that? A massive? Some kind of massive mutt

15:14 looks like. Did you know that the pug is descended from the they from the map? They made pugs out of mastiffs essentially. I don't know if you knew that you had to work the pug into the

15:25 conversation, didn't you?

15:29 The greatest breed in there on earth? Well, I've got a buddy that has like one of the purebred mastiffs, like paid 75 grand for it. It supposedly has the fourth strongest crush gradient for its

15:43 jaws of any massive on the planet. And so my buddy wanted to breed the massive. So he calls up one of the breeders and says, Hey, I want to breed my dog. And they're like, Oh yeah, you've got

15:54 great DNA And so the guy shows up with like a needle. And he's basically sucking sperm out of the dog's balls. And my buddy's like, Come on, why can't we let the dog just do it the natural way?

16:08 And the breeder turned white and just stared at him and said, You don't let that dog have sex. 'Cause if that dog has sex, who's ever gonna be able to tell that dog no? And it's literally true,

16:23 if that dog has sex, it'll pin you to the ground and just hump you till it's done. Man, now I felt the same way

16:31 Last time you were hanging out with Matt, what? Well, once you know what it's like, it's kind of you get a one-track mind and it rules your life. I get it, I know what that guy's talking about.

16:43 Okay, so let's go one more scene I wanna discuss. I mean, land man is rivaling Lily Phillips on body count here, I think. And

16:55 come on, guys, the 100, the - Oh, I know Lily Phillips, yeah. Okay, just check it. I know y'all are all married playing a who's that sweetie. I don't

17:06 know My wife and I are both like watching this lily Phillips thing just it's it's like a human nature It's like an experiment in human nature like it's not it's not even sexual. I mean it's the

17:16 sexual act But there's nobody's watching this and getting aroused. I mean, it's it's really just perplexing the whole thing Yeah, it is kind of like pimple popping now that you say that Absolutely,

17:28 so to the same about okay, so the body count on the TV show is rivaling Lily Phillips and You know, we had somebody die at the at the end. What y'all think of that scene? Yeah, the I Just go back

17:45 to like okay. We've got three deaths so far like this happens at any oil and gas company like You're shut down indefinitely So I mean and in the fact that like the guy was standing on on top of a

18:01 pile of drill pipe. I was, I'd be shocked if, if anyone's doing that today. But the same thing on it, he has stopped stomping on it and pissed off that he has to use that pipe. But I don't know.

18:16 I mean, it, it like there was still like a pretty emotional component to it where he gets the, well, I guess while he's already under the pipe, we've been smashed by the pipe and basically Billy

18:30 Gibbs or the phone and is like, well, tell her you love her. And it's kind of like, oh, that's probably, that's probably a finality there. Yeah. The reaction or I guess more importantly, the

18:43 non reaction from everybody else standing there, there's probably 20 or 30 dudes that are out on that site with them. And the fact that nobody was immediately calling 911 or trying to help, you

18:56 know, Billy Bob said don't move the pipe. with IKEA to run back to the truck and get his wife's phone to call nine one one I was like you know they need to have a couple more safety meetings in that

19:07 group Yeah Yeah the I got that one the other scene I bought we'll we should touch on is you know Ali larter makes dinner or you know everybody comes home they have the at the family Dinner I actually

19:28 thought that the conversation between Billy Bob Thornton and ally in the kitchen after she kind of stormed off from Dinner I thought that was actually a realistic type conversation between a husband

19:42 and a wife and I liked Billy Bob's advice the whole thing about you got this image of everything in your brain how it's supposed to go but we don't see it so you only get pissed off when it doesn't

19:55 happen ever I actually liked that I thought that was good couple's advice. Yeah, I agree. He knows how to tame her. If you can tame her, he knows how. He knows all the little tactics, but God,

20:09 she's a psychopath.

20:12 WTX oil texted me about that scene the other day, and he said that watching it the first time, his immediate reaction was, if he was in that position, what would he say or try to do to calm her

20:28 down and, you know, make the situation all right, and then it follows up with the kitchen scene that you're talking about, Chuck, and how it was a really interesting approach, trying to say

20:44 you're setting your expectations too high for stuff that is a priority for you, but it's not a priority for us, or for me. And if you just do this and make yourself happy, we will Appreciate it as

20:59 well, but don't expect that. And he was saying that that was a viewpoint that he appreciated, but probably wouldn't have come up with in the moment. So yeah, that was an interesting scene. You

21:14 know, I don't ever do it that well. It's always like calm down or interacting like your mother, you know? Taking that breath, honey. Yeah. Yeah, why don't you just calm down? Oh, God, no

21:26 Matt, when's the last time you asked the Warren, where are you on your menstrual cycle? Good God.

21:33 Funny you should mention that

21:37 when there's, when I was joking with her while we were watching it about the, I always know when or I seem to think

21:46 I know when where we are in the cycle. So

21:50 I can appreciate where he was at. I may not be as accurate, but I definitely have a feeling of vibe where we are in the month. Yeah so that's why you were in Houston that the three I'm going to be

22:06 here a few more days out then alright so so let's go let's go around on this one anybody got a favorite wine out of the out of the show cause I've got one and I'm sure you guys will say it before we

22:23 come back to me but Gates' Favorite line I'm an Attorney I Can't discuss any of that it's it's attorney client privilege and I was like God like they're really doggone on attorneys in the show I think

22:38 that was I'm scared to death of you right now I'm just not Gonna say anything to get me in trouble what about boar You've got a favorite line in this one I you know just the one in the when they're in

22:50 the crescent club and he said the world is can already convinced itself that we are evil for providing them the one thing that they interact with every day and we will not convince them otherwise,

22:60 stop wasting your time, stop fucking wasting mine. I thought that was fantastic. Yeah, I like that one. Matt, you got a favorite line? Yeah, I'm trying, I can't remember an exact line. I do,

23:10 I think just the overall, the title of the showWhere Is Home, I think is pretty good, because you've got like this makeshift family that's trying to sit at the dinner table, you know, a divorce

23:27 couple that's married to someone else, the kids are kind of like thrown into this haphazardly ones on spring break and then you've got the attorney and the engineer at the table too. So I think just

23:40 that general theme around the whole, the whole show is pretty good. Yeah, I like that one. You guys have all totally missed it. This was the greatest line of the episode If not, the series to

23:55 this point. Allie Larter, you know.

23:58 gets pissed off from the dinner table, runs into the kitchen. The daughter's like, come on, Billy Bob, go talk to her. Okay, I'll go talk to her. And she's sitting in there and she goes, oh

24:08 my God, I'm turning into a gum milk. And Billy Bob's like, what the fuck is a gum milk? I'm turning into a grandmother, I'd like to fuck. And I, or I'd love to fuck. And that was, and then to

24:22 follow it up, a strong number two, I'm aging out a cougar Yeah. That was, that was epic. 'Cause I didn't see that one coming, and I didn't even get gum milk when she said it. I was like, Huh,

24:36 what?

24:39 I just have this fantasy of her owning middle rights

24:45 and I need to go sign her up, you know. That would be, that would be awesome. All right, let's run around the ward. Anybody got kind of a final take. I'll go first so you guys can kind of,

24:58 think,

24:60 I'm really want to see more of Monty. And so I'm looking forward to Billy Bob

25:09 and Monty being at Monty's house, talking about what the hell to do with the cartel. Because you know, Ham's basically been there for what 30 seconds at a at a time. And I'm ready to see that

25:22 dynamic between the two of those guys happen because I think Monty can wind up being pretty intriguing on stuff. Gates final thought. So I was kind of wondering what was going on with Cooper. You

25:37 know, they can't have the guy die. He's obviously in bad shape. Looks like he got stumped pretty good by five guys. But one thing that I thought was kind of funny was, I'm pretty sure it's the

25:51 same dude in the previous episode that got his arms almost like ripped off in the workover rig who's then sitting in the truck 'cause they're pulling out of the yard. And he seems like totally fine.

26:09 His hands are there like no big cast or anything like that. And

26:16 I kind of thought that was interesting. I mean, I'm pretty sure it's that same dude. And he made a miraculous recovery. So at least he wasn't added to the body count More? What do you think on a

26:27 final thought? I totally agree with you on John Hamm. I'd like to see more of that. And we didn't talk about how Bonnie's shopper, it's a jet transition, how amazing that was. That was a really

26:39 badass Bonnie's, obviously, but a character that made the dream that we all want us. And I want to see more of that, sure. But another kind of moving mistake, or whatever, you know, she got

26:55 the house all painted, decorated, burned her out, and they burned her in the same way all in one day. 220, 000 worth of work in one day. Yeah, exactly. I mean, you know how contractors are,

27:09 especially in Midland. That'd take you a fucking two years being there.

27:14 Nice. Now you're right. If you think about it, I hadn't even thought of that point So he basically took the PJ from Fort Worth field, maybe he landed in Addison and then he jumps in a helicopter

27:32 to go to the Crescent Club

27:35 and back. That's pretty baller for just a trip over from Port Worth to Dallas. It was amazing. It was very inspiring. Very inspiring.

27:47 I think the most obnoxious thing I ever did with my private plane was I was on tour with Country Music singer Lindsey L. She's a really good friend of mine. We were flying into Deadwood. Is that

28:01 South Dakota or North Dakota? I can't remember. She was playing the casino there in Mount Rushmore. It was like an hour away. We were going to land and drive over there. We were running late.

28:13 She was going to miss Soundcheck. I actually had my pilot Buzz Mount Rushmore. Here's Mount Rushmore. He came in a bank like that so we could all take a picture. That's not Rushmore as we went by.

28:26 And yeah, back when I was rich. Now that I'm poor, I don't get to do that anymore, but anyway, it was fun. All right, Matt, final thought. Yeah, I'm kind of interested to see what happens

28:38 with this new family of sorts, or whether there's another implosion and both the females go away and they can get to work. But I would

28:51 like to see Lonnie out in Midland a lot more, just hands on and that would be pretty interesting to see him out there, 'cause they're trying to figure out the path forward just with the company and

29:06 everything else. I'd like that'd be some good entertainment for sure. Alright gents well this was fun we're on episode five of the watch for Demi Moore's tits still haven't seen him yet but looking

29:21 forward to Sunday night episode six will come out and will will regret that